Fundraising posts in a support group: kind, fair and consistent

Every health group eventually gets a post with a link to a fundraiser. Sometimes it's for their own treatment, sometimes for a friend's, sometimes for a sponsored walk. Every one of these posts comes from real need or a good heart, and every one puts moderators in an awkward spot. I'd rather we decided how to handle them while things are calm.

Why a blanket yes doesn't work

If every fundraiser is welcome, the feed slowly fills with requests, and members who are struggling financially themselves feel guilty scrolling past. It also attracts scammers, who know health groups are full of generous people. Fake appeals built on stolen photos and borrowed stories are depressingly common.

Why a blanket no doesn't either

Money is part of living with illness. A member who can't afford treatment, travel to a specialist or time off work is often in exactly the situation peer support exists for. Deleting their post can feel like being told their problem is too much for the group.

The middle path we use

• Fundraising links need a moderator's OK first. Members message a moderator before posting.
• We approve posts from members who have been part of the group for a while, for themselves or close family, once per campaign.
• Charity events go in a single monthly thread rather than separate posts.
• Requests from brand-new accounts are declined, however moving the story.

We also keep a pinned post with practical money help: patient assistance programmes, hospital financial counsellors and charities that cover travel costs. Often that does more good than a link, and it helps everyone who reads it, not only the person who asked.

I doubt there's a perfect policy here. What I want is a consistent one, so members aren't left guessing why one appeal stayed up and another came down.